How d'you do, I see you've met my faithful handyman He's just a little brought down because when you knocked He thought you were the candyman. Don't get strung out by the way that I look, Don't judge a book by its cover I'm not much of a man by the light of day, But by night I'm one hell of a lover I'm just a Sweet Transvestite from Transexual, Transylvania. So let me show you around, maybe play you a sound You look like you're both pretty groovy Or if you want something visual that's not too abysmal We could take in an old Steve Reeves movie. I'm glad we caught you at home, could we use your phone? We're both in a bit of a hurry. We'll just say where we are, then go back to the car We don't want to be any worry. So you got caught with a flat, well, how about that? Well babies, don't you panic. By the light of the night when it all seems alright I'll get you a satanic mechanic. I'm just a Sweet Transvestite from Transexual, Transylvania. So why don't you stay for the night? Or maybe a bite? I could show you my favourite obsession. I've been making a man with blond hair and a tan And he's good for relieving my tension I'm just a Sweet Transvestite from Transexual, Transylvania. So come up to the lab. And see what's on the slab. I see you shiver with antici... pation! But maybe the rain isn't really to blame So I'll remove the cause, but not the symptom.