^A-^Asus4-^{A A}-^Ami7-^A She^A swings a string of pearls on the corner The ^E street lights reflect the light in the water The ^D string it snaps and the pearls go sailing And they ^E splash and bounce and roll cross the wet street As she ^A bends to chase the pearls a car swings round the corner She ^E darts from the eyes of the panic-struck driver Who's ^D racing to the delivery room 'cause ^E in the back seat his wife is busting out of her womb ^A-^Asus4-^A And ^A the sack breaks and out come the siamese twins Who grow ^E up to become the first president With two ^D heads Are better than ^E one He ^A puts his heads in his hands, says I got to put my heads together ^E I can become the best president ever And ^D not just president Fend for ^E yourself 2x ^A-^D-^{A A}Signs his name, takes the blame for all of the names with no ^E shame In their beliefs they ^D adjourn and they leave And in walks a man with ^E a broom and a knife and blood on his hands And he ^A sweeps everything ^D under the rug And goes ^E home to his kids and gives them a hug But his ^D wife was not there, she had just left a letter That ^E said youd be much better off without me ^A-^Asus4-^{A A}-^Ami7-^A Now his ^A wife took the train to her ex-lovers funeral Who ^E died in the bathroom, hit his head on a urinal When ^D they got together, the knowledge was carnal And the ^E widow was at the funeral, and they had quite a catfight And they ^A fell into the hole ^D where the casket was resting And the ^E preacher just left in the middle of the service cause ^D death was one thing, but women made him nervous And he ^E ran to his car and he drove round the corner 2x ^A-^D-^A Then ^A something in the street caught the light in his eye He pulled ^E over, reached down, and picked up a pearl from the ^D gutter And he didn't know what to think And ^E he brought it home and washed it in the sink And ^A he gave the pearl to Sister Mary Theresa Who ^E could not accept it so she gave it to Lisa, A ^D young prostitute who was missing a pearl On the ^E necklace that broke late last night ^A-^D-^A